At least this is what he tried to tell himself as he walked the short distance from his flat to the El Dorado, as he tried to become that other person he wanted to be. He’s not the consumptive hack with the opium dealing boyfriend who hits him more than he kisses him. And he’s definitely not a law student from fucking Frankfurt.
He could become this other person for awhile and he will feel better. And he could make Bernd pay for blackening his eye (thank God it’s not so bad that the makeup can’t hide it). He could make him jealous.
Or he could just get drunk. That always works.
He entered the bar and immediately began looking for someone to impress his temporary personality upon.